“I’m the new boy at Gossip Extra.
“I was born at 7:47 a.m. to Vada Mossavat and Jose Lambiet.
“I weigh a lean but not so mean 6 lbs 1 oz. If you stretch my feet real far, I’m 19 inches and 1/2 long.
“I still don’t have a name but the adults are working on that. (Update 6/25: It’s Loic Aurelien Lambiet, L.A. for short)
“My water birth at home went very well.
“As a matter of fact, I recommend it warmly. I’m healthy and so is my momma.
“And my pop didn’t even pass out, which I appreciated.
“Anyway, I’m a little tired now, and I might still be a little shell-shocked about being born.
“I’ve got to go to sleep so I’ll be ready to meet my big brother Gregory and big sis Isabel this afternoon.
“See you soon!”